Sexpresso - Another Term Almost As Annoying As Staycation

On my walk to and from the auto mechanic today, I noticed a coffee stand on Meridian Street in the South Hill area.
Well, actually the first thing I noticed was a bleached blond woman in a bikini. She was making a coffee drink. On my second time by the establishment, the blond had been replaced by a dark-haired woman. This latte vixen was leaning over the counter toward a man in an old hatchback, exposing her cleavage as much as possible.
The name of the stand is Hot Chick-A-Latte (clever, huh?) and it's not the only franchise in the Puget Sound that takes advantage of horny men. Cowgirls Espresso adheres to the motto "Forget what you think a barista's supposed to look like." This post-modernist philosophy has produced a semi-structured schedule* to allure customers:

Military Monday
Cowgirls Tuesday
Bikini Wednesday
School Girl Thursday (shouldn't they be in class on Thursdays? it's very naughty to miss first period Social Studies)
Fantasy Friday (will there be elves and fairies? or will there be dirty cops? probably a little too much information regarding my fantasies)

Bikini Bottom Espresso, another coffee stand chain (with locations in Tacoma, Lakewood, and Puyallup and not related to Spongebob Squarepants), promises "that our girls will leave you with a smile on your face and a tantalizing experience in your cup."

Now, I acknowledge that these sexy latte stands are providing healthy tips for industrious young women. But I would feel embarrassed to drive up and have to order a drink called a "Wet Dream." More to the point, it's now okay for me to stare at a woman's ass while she's working? This may be sending my brain the wrong message. Pretty soon, I'll be ogling a McDonald's employee's bosom while she's making my McFlurry. And next thing you know, I'm checking out the curves on the bus drivers, post office employees, and meter maids.
It's a slippery slope, my friend.
Think of the children.

But maybe some folks out there find the sound of steaming milk arousing. (Cssshshhhshshshhhshhh)
And to each his own.
(Cssshshhhshshshhhshhh)

*How about Slavery Saturdays and Satanic Sundays? I admit it would be a little harder to time shots perfectly with manacles on your wrists, or a trident in one hand.