Monday, March 21, 2011

World Leader Intros, Part Deux

Introductions for world leaders continued. In two weeks, we'll find out who will be crowned above everyone.

The Asian Leaders

Bill Bowman
Mammal Name: Genghis Khan
Highest Finish: 1st (2008)
2011 Champion Pick: Kansas
Fun fact: Khan's empire was four times larger than the empire of Alexander the Great. Even after his death, his successors increased the size of the Mongol kingdom. Until they got to Vienna, which featured a dense fortification of harpsichords.

Sue Bowman
Name: Queen of Sheba
Highest Finish: 1st (2009)
2011 Champion Pick: Kansas
Fun fact: In the Hebrew biblical account, the Queen of Sheba travels to King Solomon's land to offer him gifts of gold, spices, and stones, and he reciprocated by giving her everything she desired. But that's not how she remembers him. He was actually a bit of a tightwad.

Kim
Name: Snow Leopard
Highest Finish: 1st (2010)
2011 Champion Pick: Duke
Fun fact: In Central Asia, the snow leopard is an endangered species partly because its skin, bones and organs are highly valued for their uses in traditional medicine. Tylenol hasn't quite caught on in Tajikistan. (I assume Kim is sticking with the same name because it worked for him last year)

The European Leaders

Robert
Name: Nero CCAG
Highest Finish: 4th (2008)
2011 Champion Pick: Ohio St.
Fun fact: Nero rose to the position of Roman Emperor when his mother Agrippina poisoned his stepfather Claudius. Nero later killed his mother when she opposed his choice of a mistress, Poppaea Sabina, whom he also later murdered. This history of violence is perhaps why no one focuses on the Nero's mastery of the lyre.

Peter
Name: Silvio Berlusconi (pictured above)
Highest Finish: 1st (2006, 2007)
2011 Champion Pick: Ohio St.
Fun fact: In comparison to Nero, the Italian Prime Minister Berlusconi is a saint. He's only been accused of tax fraud, embezzlement, paying for sex with a minor, and bribing a judge...and well, he's still in power. So he must be innocent on all charges.

Michael Busick
Name: Pope John Paul I
Highest Finish: 7th (2006, 2009)
2011 Champion Pick: Ohio St.
Fun fact: John Paul I was truly the William Henry Harrison of popes, only lasting 33 days in his papal office. But how glorious those days were, in the summer of 1978, when Barry Gibb dominated the music charts with four No. 1 hits.

Michael Heiser
Name: Mussolini
Highest Finish: 3rd (2010)
2011 Champion Pick: Duke
Fun fact: Known to his citizens as "Il Duce," Mussolini was a fascist leader who dreamed of bringing Italy back to glory, after the country fell into economic ruin after the First World War. Unfortunately, invading Albania and joining forces with Adolph Hitler will only get you so far.

Tom
Name: Hrothgar
Highest Finish: 3rd (2008)
2011 Champion Pick: Ohio St.
Fun fact: Hrothgar was a legendary Danish king that appeared in Beowulf and many Norse sagas and poems. So I'm assuming he looked something like a Viking, with a gallant white beard and rosy cheeks. But maybe I'm thinking of the cartoon series David the Gnome, which was on Nickelodeon when I was 8 years old.

Tina (sister-in-law)
Name: Empress Theodora
Highest Finish: 2nd (2009)
2011 Champion Pick: Kansas
Fun fact: Before she became a Byzantine empress (on April 4th, 527 - the same date as this year's Final Four championship game), Theodora was the daughter of a bear trainer and an actress. She and her husband Justinian transformed Constantinople (Istanbul) into a modern city with aqueducts and bridges, as well as constructing the Hagia Sophia.

Bruce Treut
Name: Benito Regale
Highest Finish: 22nd (2010)
2011 Champion Pick: Kansas
Fun fact: I'm not sure who this person is. Google was no help. Could it be a second Mussolini? A character in an obscure movie or book? Maybe a sandwich? Whatever the case, it seems to helping Bruce. He's tied for 12th, which is an improvement after last year.

The African Leaders

Alison
Name: Cleopatra Last Pharoah of Egypt
Highest Finish: 2nd (2010)
2011 Champion Pick: Duke
Fun fact: I didn't realize how much Cleopatra got around, until reading about her marriages to two pharoahs (who were also her brothers), and her relationships with Caesar and Mark Antony. But you have to understand it was a different time back then, and ruler husbands had short life expectancies.

Rick (brother)
Name: Emperor Haile Selassie
Highest Finish: 7th (2003, 2010)
2011 Champion Pick: Ohio St.
Fun fact: His name means "Might of the Trinity," and he is perceived as the reincarnation of Jesus Christ by Rastafarians. Haile Selassie's reign as the Emperor of Ethiopia began in 1930 before it was interrupted by a Mussolini-led Italian invasion. When he returned to power , he created a special place called Zion. Jah, man.

2 comments:

  1. "he is perceived as the reincarnation of Jesus Christ by Rastafarians" Interesting, I would have sworn Bob Marley would have been the correct answer to that. ;)

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  2. "...and ruler husbands had short life expectancies." I hope Alison's husband isn't reading this blog.

    ReplyDelete