World Leader Intros, Part Deux

Introductions for world leaders continued. In two weeks, we'll find out who will be crowned above everyone.

The Asian Leaders

Bill Bowman
Mammal Name: Genghis Khan
Highest Finish: 1st (2008)
2011 Champion Pick: Kansas
Fun fact: Khan's empire was four times larger than the empire of Alexander the Great. Even after his death, his successors increased the size of the Mongol kingdom. Until they got to Vienna, which featured a dense fortification of harpsichords.

Sue Bowman
Name: Queen of Sheba
Highest Finish: 1st (2009)
2011 Champion Pick: Kansas
Fun fact: In the Hebrew biblical account, the Queen of Sheba travels to King Solomon's land to offer him gifts of gold, spices, and stones, and he reciprocated by giving her everything she desired. But that's not how she remembers him. He was actually a bit of a tightwad.

Kim
Name: Snow Leopard
Highest Finish: 1st (2010)
2011 Champion Pick: Duke
Fun fact: In Central Asia, the snow leopard is an endangered species partly because its skin, bones and organs are highly valued for their uses in traditional medicine. Tylenol hasn't quite caught on in Tajikistan. (I assume Kim is sticking with the same name because it worked for him last year)

The European Leaders

Robert
Name: Nero CCAG
Highest Finish: 4th (2008)
2011 Champion Pick: Ohio St.
Fun fact: Nero rose to the position of Roman Emperor when his mother Agrippina poisoned his stepfather Claudius. Nero later killed his mother when she opposed his choice of a mistress, Poppaea Sabina, whom he also later murdered. This history of violence is perhaps why no one focuses on the Nero's mastery of the lyre.

Peter
Name: Silvio Berlusconi (pictured above)
Highest Finish: 1st (2006, 2007)
2011 Champion Pick: Ohio St.
Fun fact: In comparison to Nero, the Italian Prime Minister Berlusconi is a saint. He's only been accused of tax fraud, embezzlement, paying for sex with a minor, and bribing a judge...and well, he's still in power. So he must be innocent on all charges.

Michael Busick
Name: Pope John Paul I
Highest Finish: 7th (2006, 2009)
2011 Champion Pick: Ohio St.
Fun fact: John Paul I was truly the William Henry Harrison of popes, only lasting 33 days in his papal office. But how glorious those days were, in the summer of 1978, when Barry Gibb dominated the music charts with four No. 1 hits.

Michael Heiser
Name: Mussolini
Highest Finish: 3rd (2010)
2011 Champion Pick: Duke
Fun fact: Known to his citizens as "Il Duce," Mussolini was a fascist leader who dreamed of bringing Italy back to glory, after the country fell into economic ruin after the First World War. Unfortunately, invading Albania and joining forces with Adolph Hitler will only get you so far.

Tom
Name: Hrothgar
Highest Finish: 3rd (2008)
2011 Champion Pick: Ohio St.
Fun fact: Hrothgar was a legendary Danish king that appeared in Beowulf and many Norse sagas and poems. So I'm assuming he looked something like a Viking, with a gallant white beard and rosy cheeks. But maybe I'm thinking of the cartoon series David the Gnome, which was on Nickelodeon when I was 8 years old.

Tina (sister-in-law)
Name: Empress Theodora
Highest Finish: 2nd (2009)
2011 Champion Pick: Kansas
Fun fact: Before she became a Byzantine empress (on April 4th, 527 - the same date as this year's Final Four championship game), Theodora was the daughter of a bear trainer and an actress. She and her husband Justinian transformed Constantinople (Istanbul) into a modern city with aqueducts and bridges, as well as constructing the Hagia Sophia.

Bruce Treut
Name: Benito Regale
Highest Finish: 22nd (2010)
2011 Champion Pick: Kansas
Fun fact: I'm not sure who this person is. Google was no help. Could it be a second Mussolini? A character in an obscure movie or book? Maybe a sandwich? Whatever the case, it seems to helping Bruce. He's tied for 12th, which is an improvement after last year.

The African Leaders

Alison
Name: Cleopatra Last Pharoah of Egypt
Highest Finish: 2nd (2010)
2011 Champion Pick: Duke
Fun fact: I didn't realize how much Cleopatra got around, until reading about her marriages to two pharoahs (who were also her brothers), and her relationships with Caesar and Mark Antony. But you have to understand it was a different time back then, and ruler husbands had short life expectancies.

Rick (brother)
Name: Emperor Haile Selassie
Highest Finish: 7th (2003, 2010)
2011 Champion Pick: Ohio St.
Fun fact: His name means "Might of the Trinity," and he is perceived as the reincarnation of Jesus Christ by Rastafarians. Haile Selassie's reign as the Emperor of Ethiopia began in 1930 before it was interrupted by a Mussolini-led Italian invasion. When he returned to power , he created a special place called Zion. Jah, man.

World Leader Intros, Part Un

Time to get to know who you're playing against, March Madness pool participants. Let's start with the stalwarts of the two 20th Century superpowers, followed by other important people of the Western Hemisphere. Notably absent from our field are Manuel Noriega, Pancho Villa, and James Buchanan.

The Americans

Aunt Pat

Name: Abe Lincoln

Highest Finish: 6th (2010)

2011 Champion Pick: Ohio St.

Fun fact: In his famous debates with Democrat Stephen Douglas, Abraham Lincoln proclaimed that a “house divided against itself cannot stand.” He also coined the saying, “check yourself before you wreck yourself.”

Charles

Name: ESPN-worldwide leader in sports

Highest Finish: 9th (2009)

2011 Champion Pick: Kansas

Fun fact: “Jim Rome Is Burning” is the second most popular television program in Suriname.

Vince O’Flaherty

Name: Vincent O’Flaherty

Highest Finish: 1st (2003)

2011 Champion Pick: Kansas St.

Fun fact: In 1982, Mr. O’Flaherty discovered the original recipe for Coca-Cola underneath a seat cushion inside an Atlanta waffle house. He promptly used it as a napkin.

Bill Rochfort

Name: Bill Rochfort

Highest Finish: Rookie

2011 Champion Pick: Kansas

Fun fact: Mr. Rochfort has 12-game winning streak in Chinese checkers, and yet he has never won a game of HORSE. It’s unbelievable, really...

The Russians

Matt Bowman

Name: Vladimir Ilyich Ulyanov

Highest Finish: 6th (2009)

2011 Champion Pick: Pittsburgh

Fun fact: During Vladimir Lenin’s five year reign, civil war broke out in Russia. Lenin called on his Red Army to defeat the dissidents, known as the White Russians. Why isn’t there a popular cocktail called “Red Army?” How much grenadine is too much grenadine?

Mom/Nancy

Name: Nikita Khrushchev

Highest Finish: 4th (2009)

2011 Champion Pick: San Diego St.

Fun fact: In 1963, Khrushchev decided to remove Soviet missiles from Cuba, and a catastrophic confrontation between two superpowers was avoided. But he did leave a fully operational 120-foot tall Molotov cocktail on the island, just as a reminder.

Brian

Name: Feodor the Bellringer

Highest Finish: 2nd (2005)

2011 Champion Pick: Kansas

Fun fact: Feodor took a different approach to governing than his father Ivan the Terrible. He let his brother-in-law run the country, while he traveled to various cities and rang church bells. In his journal, the tsar kept personalized rankings of the most comfortable church pews. The Church of Christ in Irkutsk was his favorite.

The Pan-American Revolutionaries

Paula

Name: Evita

Highest Finish: 3rd (2007)

2011 Champion Pick: Ohio St.

Fun fact: Before marrying Argentine president Juan Peron, Eva Peron worked as a radio and television actress. Madonna, who played “Evita” in the movie, has never taken an acting class in her life.

Missy (girlfriend)

Name: Che

Highest Finish: Rookie

2011 Champion Pick: Ohio St.

Fun fact: Until Che was executed in 1967, Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid were the most famous people to be killed by the Bolivian Army.

Me aka The Commish

Name: Fidel Castro (pictured above)

Highest Finish: 1st (2002, 2004)

2011 Champion Pick: Kansas

Fun fact: After being released from a Cuban prison, Castro went to Mexico to plan his overthrowing of General Batista’s government. Che Guevara joined forces with Castro, on the condition that no other insurgent in their group would be able to wear a beret. Che didn’t want anyone stealing his signature look, least of all Castro.

Dad/Jim

Name: Pierre Trudeau (pictured above)

Highest Finish: 2nd (2003, 2008)

2011 Champion Pick: Kansas

Fun fact: John Lennon once said that “if all politicians were like Pierre Trudeau, there would be world peace.” Yoko Ono, on the other hand, was a fervent believer in Quebec separatism, and heckled Trudeau every chance she got.

In a day or two, get to know the rest of your competition...from the far reaches of Europe, Africa and Asia.

World Dream Team

In 2008 and 2010, the USA men's basketball team returned to prominence by winning a gold medal in Beijing and the World Championship in Turkey. But recent American teams haven't been nearly as dominant as the 1992 or 1994 Dream Teams. In 1992, the U.S. won each game by an average of 43.8 points (Croatia came the closest, only losing by 32 points). During those eight games, the NBA players shot 58% from the floor and Michael Jordan had 37 steals. Dream Team II, led by Shaquille O'Neal, Reggie Miller, and Dominique Wilkins, beat their opponents by an average of 37.7 points. In the 1994 gold medal game, the Americans crushed the Russians 137-91, the second most points scored by a U.S. team in international play.

The magnificence of the first two Dream Teams will never be matched, that's for sure. Well, at least not in the Olympic Games. But I can imagine a far greater force, a group that would command more respect than NBA players, and would have the power to alter history more significantly. "Impossible," you say, "what could be better than Magic Johnson, Michael Jordan, Charles Barkley and Larry Bird playing together as a team on the hardwood?" If you guessed a reunion of the original members of Cream, you're wrong. Trust me on this one.

What I propose is a World Leader Dream Team, made up of historical figures of unquestionable strength and resolve. Together, I believe they would destroy anyone who tried to oppose them, impose their will upon both their supporters and retractors, and possibly start a few revolutions along the way. Maybe they'd even get around to poverty and world peace. It was hard to leave Mussolini off this roster, but he just doesn't work well in a group. Here are your starters for the World Leader Dream Team, by position:

Point Guard: Nelson Mandela

He spent over 25 years in a South African prison for his political beliefs, and when he was released, he helped end apartheid and establish multi-racial democracy. Mandela also got married for the third time on his 80th birthday, so you know this guy will never stop hustling on the court. Good at setting screens and directing his teammates.

Guard: Simon Bolivar

This talented Venezuelan military leader was one of the main reasons Colombia, Peru, Panama, Ecuador and much of South America gain independence from Spain. Oh yeah, and in 1825, people named a country after him. Expert defender and liberator of basketballs.

Small Forward: Catherine The Great

Not just anyone can extend serfdom to parts of Ukraine. During her 34-year reign, she went to war with the Ottoman Empire and expanded Russia's control of the Baltics and the Middle East. She even encouraged exploration of Alaska. Very useful post player.

Power Forward: Henry V

I never read the Shakespeare play. It probably wasn't as tragic as Othello. This battle-tested veteran, however, did lead a successful attack on Normandy and many parts of France. Henry V is most famous for the Battle of Agincourt (1415), where his outnumbered, exhausted army routed the French, thanks to the English longbow. So be careful when he steps out to the perimeter. With his deadly three point accuracy, he can shred a weak zone defense.

Center: Ghengis Khan

Today, you see his face on Mongolian banknotes and Kazakhstan coins, and you probably think of him as a conquering invader of China and Central Asia. But he was a uniter, not a divider. Khan made of confederation of all the tribes on the Mongol steppes...and then he went about taking all the territory that spanned the Silk Road, from the Black Sea to the Pacific Ocean. Good luck trying to stop him in the paint.

Reserves: Chiang Kai-shek, Joan of Arc, Andrew Jackson, Ramses II, Prince Henry the Navigator, Benazir Bhutto

The Fearless #12 Seeds

Remember Cornell's improbable run to the Sweet Sixteen last year? An Ivy League team totally obliterated Temple (the Atlantic 10 champion) and Big Ten powerhouse Wisconsin in the first two rounds. Well, it wasn't that improbable. Since 1985, the No. 12 seeds have beaten the No. 5 seeds 33.7% of the time. I feel like I keep recycling this fact every year of my commissionership, but it still astounds me that #5 seeds perform so poorly. In every NCAA tournament, it's pretty much guaranteed that one or two #12 underdogs will prevail. In your bracket, you have five possible 5-12 upset scenarios (because there is a play-in game between UAB/Clemson for the chance to play #5 West Virginia). So, who do you pick?

I think the key to predicting these games, like any other first round games, is evaluating the quality of coaching and team leadership. In 2004, Manhattan knocked off Florida in the first round on the back of senior guard Luis Flores, who scored 26 points en route to a 15-point victory. Flores, the nation's third leading scorer that year, attacked the Gators mercilessly from everywhere and created opportunities for his teammates. However, the Jaspers' amazing performance may also be partly attributed to great coaching. Manhattan coach Bobby Gonzalez told his players not to think about the game like an "upset," and to ignore the team name on the other jerseys. He reminded them how close they came to winning against Syracuse (the eventual champion) in the previous year, and that given another chance, they would win. You can take into account other factors, such as Florida's lackluster play in the second half of the season, and the Jaspers out-rebounding the Gators 36-26...but ultimately, Manhattan had a gifted and passionate leader on the court (Flores), and a coach who inspired his players.

(On interesting sidenote, Bobby Gonzalez was fired from Seton Hall in 2010 after a first round game in the NIT, in which one of his players punched an opposing player in the groin and the coach received his 7th technical foul of the season...so maybe, in that case, he inspired his players to play too aggressively. Luis Flores, by the way, is playing for a Ukrainian team, BC Donetsk, after an unsuccessful stint in the NBA.)

So, given our recent history lesson, do Richmond, Utah State, Memphis, and UAB or Clemson have the tools to pull off wins over the #5 seeds? Out of these 5 teams, Richmond, Utah State, and Clemson all suffered first-round losses last year in March Madness, so their players have been on the big stage before. UAB and Richmond both have senior players who score 17+ points per game, in guard Jamarr Sanders and forward Justin Harper, respectively. Richmond's Harper is a special player who can score and rebound in the paint and shoot threes (46% from beyond the arc, and 54% FG overall). Utah State and Memphis feature more balanced attacks, with scoring distributed more evenly among the players. More offensive options should be a good thing, right? Yes, in theory...but time and time again, we see stars like Stephen Curry of Davidson lighting up the scoreboards and carrying their teams to victory. I'll go ahead and make the argument that in tournament play, you'd rather have one great player than a bunch of good players...because great coaching should be able to squeeze more out of an adequate supporting cast, whereas a marquis player is essential and harder to come by. In terms of coaching, Utah State has the edge. In 11 seasons, Aggies coach Stew Morrill has led his team to at least 23 wins every season but one (21 in 2008), and Utah State has been in the NIT or NCAA tournament every year he's been on the sidelines.

Whoa...I'm overwhelmed by all the information I've been digging up. Look, just take Richmond as your upset pick. It's what all the pundits and sportswriters say, and I happen to agree with them. Now that I've overanalyzed these first round matchups, I've left little time to study who actually will win the NCAA championship. Oh well, there are only really three teams to choose from - the Dukies, the Buckeyes, and the Jayhawks. Right?

Book Smarts

Tomorrow we find out who will represent the Ivy League in the NCAA tournament. Harvard and Princeton will have a one-game playoff at Yale University, of all places. According to Joe Lunardi of ESPN, the teams are playing for a No. 13 seed. That's right - Harvard and Princeton, the No. 1 and No. 2 national universities in US News World and Report's 2011 rankings, are fighting for a double-digit seed in the big dance. I know the NCAA tournament selection committee does not consider graduation and retention rates of colleges when determining where to place teams, nor does it evaluate student selectivity (standard SAT scores for Harvard and Princeton freshmen usually range from 1390-1580).

But how would the brackets look if they were based on academic rankings? Based on U.S. World News and Report's findings, out of the teams heading to the tournament, here's who would capture No. 1, No. 2, No. 3 and No. 4 seeds. This, of course, is an alternate universe where educational excellence is valued over athletics (and the sports entertainment industry and merchandising and television licensing). And I'm not saying I want to see a group of guys from MIT play a pick-up game. I just thought it would be interesting to see the brackets re-organized in this fashion. Next to each university is its overall score in USNW&R.

East Region - No. 1: Harvard/Princeton (100)

Southwest Region - No. 1: Notre Dame (78)

Southeast Region - No. 1: Duke (90)

West Region - No. 1: Vanderbilt (80)

East Region - No. 2: Georgetown (74)

Southwest Region - No. 2: Michigan (71)

Southeast Region - No. 2: North Carolina (70)

West Region - No. 2: UCLA (73)

East Region - No. 3: Boston College (63)

Southwest Region - No. 3: Illinois (61)

Southeast Region - No. 3: Wisconsin (61)

West Region - No. 3: Washington (59)

East Region - No. 4: Pittsburgh (52)

Southwest Region - No. 4: Texas (57)

Southeast Region - No. 4: Florida (57)

West Region - No. 4: Ohio State (53)

So it's not surprising that all of the No. 1 seeds are private universities, in this little experiment. However, there are a ton of great state schools. In closing, I would really like to see a Johns Hopkins get a Division I men's basketball team, despite a couple of weak showings against Swarthmore and Ursinus this year.

Goin' Back In Time

If you follow South Carolina college basketball as closely as I do (and I'm not just talking about the Gamecocks), you know that the Wofford Terriers made their way back into the NCAA men's tournament. Last year, the Terriers lost in the first round as a No. 13 seed to the Wisconsin Badgers by four points. This year, Wofford is projected as a No. 15 seed. So the chances they're going to move on to the second round are slim. But Wofford still gets an award for "most questionable pronounciation." Does the first syllable sound like the "wa" in "waffles?" Or is it a "woe" or "woo" sound? Probably depends on what region of the country you hail from...

Wofford does have one of the cuter live mascots: Blitz II, a Boston Terrier (pictured here with Boss, the costume mascot). The only other tournament-bound pet that rivals Blitz II in terms of adorability is Rocky, the UNC-Asheville Bulldog.

Before we get a chance to fill out our brackets for 2011, let's take a look back...all the way back to 2010. (Here's a link showing last year's results, in case you're curious).

Could the 2010 tourney darlings contend for the crown again in 2011?

Last year's Elite Eight featured two SEC teams and two Big 12 teams, and none of them made the Final Four. As of right now, all of the final eight teams in 2010 are probably making the tournament this year, except for Baylor. Here's a quick snapshot of each team:

Duke

2011: 27-4

How did the Blue Devils move on without their team captain (and points and assists leader) John Scheyer? They still have guard Nolan Smith, who is the 11th leading scorer in the nation. Plus Kyle Singler is averaging 17 points per game and those meddlesome Plumlee brothers are still throwing their weight around in the paint.

Butler

2011: 22-9

The Bulldogs won't go away. At least not yet. Butler lost to rival Milwaukee twice during the season, but was able to beat them in the Horizon Conference tournament to clinch a postseason berth. They've got loads of experience and two capable playmakers (Howard and Mack).

West Virginia

2011: 20-10

The Mountaineers have maintained a stingy defense, allowing 64 points per game. They also rank 6th in three-point FG defense. This team includes five seniors, and a man whose first name is Truck (Bryant).

Michigan State

2011: 17-13

Everyone, including myself, thought the Spartans were headed back to the Final Four. But they'll be lucky if they get a tournament invite. A first round loss to Iowa in the Big Ten tourney will put them in the NIT.

Tennessee

2011: 18-13

The Volunteers are ridiculously inconsistent. Earlier this season, they beat #7 Pitt, and then managed to score only 48 points in a loss to the University of Charlotte. Might have something to do with the coaching duties being split between suspended coach Bruce Pearl and associate coach Tony Jones.

Kansas State

2011: 22-9

The most frightening head coach in basketball, Frank Martin, will hurt me if I say anything bad about the #19 Wildcats. KSU has won 8 out of its last 9 games, including three wins against ranked teams.

Kentucky

2011: 22-8

The three leading scorers on Calipari's squad are freshmen. And I imagine they'll be joining John Wall in the NBA very soon. So don't get used to Terrence Jones in a blue jersey. A teenager from New Jersey named Michael Gilchrist is already in line to replace him at power forward. You'll know his name next year.

Baylor

2011: 18-12

The Bears lost to Texas Tech, Iowa State, Oklahoma and Oklahoma State this season. Those are the worst teams in the Big 12, just so you know. Their quality wins against Texas A&M won't save them.