I learned recently that I'm going to Italy this fall for a relative's wedding.I'll be spending time with family in the beautiful Lake Como area, with a few days in Milan. When I picked up the book "Eyewitness Travel Guide: Milan & The Lakes," I expected to read about all of the basilicas, art galleries, restaurants, shopping centers, etc. What surprised me is that there is a theme park in northern Italy called "Gardaland," which opened in 1975 and has a dragon mascot (Prezzemolo) instead of a mouse. I won't be making it there on my trip, but there are many reasons to go...which I will mention...and by no circumstances will I make fun of website's English translations. That's just culturally insensitive.
#1 Palablu: Italy's largest dolphin pool. Enough said.
#2 Space Vertigo: I'm not sure why the travel guide and website differ on the reason for falling 40 meters from a tower (reacting to a bacteriological alarm in the space station or to escape an alien invasion), but it's bound to get the adrenaline going!
#3 Blue Tornado: "Climb aboard the Blue Tornado like the mythical Top Guns, and strike out on a thrilling mission [website]."
#4 Colorado Boat: "Let yourself be carried down the impetuous Colorado River waterfalls, aboard a floating trunk [website]." The impetuousness of the rapids will cause a nervous excitation, whereupon the rider will gasp and shutter, and be jostled to and fro. My word! What a remarkable means of conveyance!
#5 Fantasy Kingdom: "Children will love this! The talking trees, singing animals and puppet show will keep them entertained for hours [travel guide]." In fact, you can just leave your kids there for a period of days while you are drinking chianti at the Pizzeria Saloon and enjoying the western and magic shows. The trees have excellent sleeping hollows for the children; their branches provide essential nutrients, and they tell stories that will slowly erase all previous memories. Word of caution: Never mention the Colorado Boat trunks!!!
#6 Baby Magic Club: I'm not making this name up.
#7 Funny Express: "The funniest train in the world is ready for departure from Fantasy Kingdom station [website]." When you stop laughing, you know the ride is over.
#8 Saltomotto: "Breathless emotions for "courageous" tots [website]." Courageous is in quotations marks, because children are weak and cowardly. But why mock them directly?
#9 Dinosaur Island: "On a remote island - and without human interference - dinosaurs have continued to exist. You can join an expedition to study and help save them [travel guide]." You should be concerned first and foremost with the preservation of prehistoric reptiles. Then you might want to stop them from devouring your children. (Exhibit not mentioned on website - possibly extinct? (sorry, bad pun))
#10 Time Voyagers: "Dash into the high canyons and gloomy meanders of a world that is still uncharted. The abyss swallows you up and only an alien life can come to your rescue [website]."
To explore the park yourself, consult this map. I genuinely think the Mammut roller coaster looks pretty fun. It's based on the following premise: Soviet scientists coming across a frozen woolly mammoth that appears to be alive - this somehow translates to a thrill-packed ride. I guess you're running away from the Mammut?
Homework assignment: What is the difference between a church and a basilica? Is it somewhat like the comparison between a man-made lake and reservoir?
Dude, that was an awesome pun; how can you say sorry for that. That's like your parents saying they're sorry for giving birth to you...actually, I'm still waiting for that appology. :p
ReplyDeleteThe Latin word basilica (derived from Greek, Basiliké Stoà, Royal Stoa), was originally used to describe a Roman public building (as in Greece, mainly a tribunal), usually located in the forum of a Roman town. In Hellenistic cities, public basilicas appeared in the 2nd century BC.
ReplyDeleteAfter the Roman Empire became officially Christian, the term came by extension to specifically refer to a large and important church that has been given special ceremonial rites by the Pope. Thus the word retains two senses today, one architectural and the other ecclesiastical.